Motivation only goes so far.

I am a logical person. I knew when starting my blog(s) [there have been others], that I may spend the rest of eternity in loneliness and self-loathing. I have another one that I have just started using as an online diary. I keep most of that one set to private.

When I start a new blog I'm happy and enthusiastic and cheerful and elated....and a lot of other words that can stand in as synonyms.

I have had my other blog/diary for about 5 years, it never went anywhere, it has degraded into the shoulder I cry on when the self-loathing creeps up and nags me into the dark hollow that is the bottom of what is left of my heart.

You know you can just scratch blogs and insert any hobby I ever do. I've done photo editing with GIMP and I did indeed become better. It allowed me to do things like this:

And these:

And finally I did trickier things like this:

Now all I really do with GIMP is draw dinky doodles for this blog and cleanup pictures for friends like this:

I also made profile layouts for one site which I have now deleted. I think I made upwards of 80 and never went anywhere. I made Neopets accounts and played them. Designed a shop and signatures for the chat boards (which required learning some HTML), and finally got bored with that.

As a matter of fact the only thing I've managed to stick to and go anywhere with is college and I think that was mostly just to prove to everyone that I'm not stupid. After being in college for four years I'm not sure I accomplished anything but a thorough grasp APA formatting.

Without any feedback or something to encourage me, something that says "Hey you're going somewhere!" I tend to give up on things after a while.

I have learned something nice about keeping a blog here:

The Stats Page. Its this magical page that google has which allows one to see how popular or unpopular the interwebs thinks they are. As long as I keep getting a few views every day and my over-all numbers keep going up, I will keep trying to post interesting things on this blog.

So everyone here is my plea:

Kudos if you don't tilt your head to read the last part, don't be ashamed I do it too.