5 Reasons to Play Dead

Playing dead is a concept most people are fairly familiar with. I'm not sure of the validity of some of these but I'm still going to share them with captions. :)

1). According to all the old cartoons I used to watch you play dead so you won't be attacked by a bear!

I would probably run.

 Honestly, if a bear were to come near me I would probably run screaming, which is also probably not the wisest course of action; however, I am also not very sure of the validity in playing dead here.





2). If you are a scared opossum.

Probably the most awesomely drawn awesome opossum EVER!

Opossums play dead, I have seen this. Although, I am not sure of the mechanics. Maybe they just faint or something.

Nasty creatures.






3). You wake up in the middle of the night and hear something you don't want to hear.

Just anything really, you wake up when you were a kid because you have to pee and over hear your parents doing the horizontal mambo, yea, that is a great time to play dead. Put a pillow over your head and pretend some evil murderer snuck into your room and suffocated you to death. Vividly imagine how terrible that would be for everyone, envision your funeral, and pretend you go to Valhalla. Whatever floats your boat because it has to be better than the reality of your parents being a little too happy in the other room.

4). Someone comes to wake you up in the morning.

It's before Noon why are you so cheerful anyway?

You could pretend to sleep but then you are forced to pretend like you are waking up when they come shake you. It is much simpler to play dead. When they come to shake you just stay limp and dangly like. Hopefully, they just panic and run away and you can go back to sleep.






5). To get out of stupid arguments you don't want to be involved in anymore.

I actually have done this before, it works rather well. A few times when The Man and I have been in some frivolous debate I simply got tired of it. I didn't see the point over debating who left the ketchup out on the counter. It's ketchup. It doesn't need to be refrigerated, it will survive the apocalypse and nuclear fall out. One night on the counter isn't going to hurt it. I looked him dead in the face and said "I don't feel like arguing anymore", then I flopped over, went limp and played dead.

He got really frustrated but I kept playing dead. Then he started whining that it wasn't fair and I still kept playing dead. Then he started laughing and hugged me. For me playing dead worked pretty well for stopping dumb debates.

I showed him this picture and he said "Oh. You playing dead." He gets so enthused about my doodles.